Longing

 I have learned that most of my sadness comes from a place of longing which in each day translates to hope. 

Longing is a looking forward, deep desire forward, begging and crawling forward for my soul has seen, but not yet arrived. 

Longing is not wanting - want feels invasive, selfish and possessive. This newly discovered longing resides so firm and seems to linger at the top of my hearts wanderings. I'm not sure it will ever be satiated and maybe that is what keeps me going.

This longing is not one of doing. The longing is in our being - or somewhere between being and doing with no forced will of my own. 

As I clear out past things I long for the arrival of those things - aware of the tension within myself to push forward too quickly or lag behind. 

As I live in this everyday world I recognize the longing for others to long for more. I long for them to be whole, for them to love deeply and be loved, be known fully and know.

I wonder if these deep longings is the way God communes with me every day - tethering me close so not to loose hope.

These longings are continual prayer. Some of lament, some of praise. Some of continuous questions calling to surrender. 

Maybe its our place to seek out longings with others. To see sadness, working or striving and name the deep longing with them - to put out the invite that keeps us tethered. 

Am I aware of the deepest longings of my heart? Knowing my longings allows space to walk with others.

So I ask - what are the longings of your heart?