The Vision

She curled in a small ball on the ground, entering into a state of mind she had gone many times before. Full of every sort of shame and remorse her young mind could conger up.  Regret of not filling her duty as their child, deserving in her isolation and shame.  She stayed not out of fear, but out of self atonement, punishment.  In the stay she was not overcome.  She heaved with deep sorrow not meant to be known by a small child.  Her body convulsing with the refusal to make a sound. Tears silently fell from her eyes and gently watered the earth. There was no way to know, that as the wind threw her hair amiss and her clothing became soiled she was not alone.

Gods eyes, Gods plan, a plan overlapping the physical.  Time stands still and in a vision, this place of assurance and healing came into full focus.

Panning out from this dark, dirt-filled smoke, moving up further into a place where the child is but the size of a fist... this spirit gasps... jumps... becomes overwhelmed.  As wind gently nudges the childs surroundings,  a legion of angels surrounds this space the girls has created for herself.  Spread in the full unashamed glory of the Father, their wings encompass this space.  A safe house where choices and consequences are felt and known, but only pass by in the authority of the Father.  Outside of this space a battle being fought for her life. 

Had I known...  Had I believed...  And yet some visions are meant for a time and a space outside of time.  Things change when you have seen the angels that keep the world at bay.  Things that once made complete sense change in the light of Jesus' saving power.  Things change in a moment of complete healing.  In a moment of asking and receiving what God wants to show you.  A moment, and then a process.  A process away from my eternal home... in my spirit knowing this world has so much more to offer.  Excited to live abundantly in the Spirit.  There is always so much more. 

If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,”

    and you make the Most High your dwelling,
10 no harm will overtake you,
    no disaster will come near your tent.
11 For he will command his angels concerning you
    to guard you in all your ways;
12 they will lift you up in their hands,
    so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
    you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

14 “Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
    I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call on me, and I will answer him;
    I will be with him in trouble,
    I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him
    and show him my salvation.”

Psalm 91:9-16

My time with God this morning was very encouraging so I thought I would share a bit from it.

"The Lord said to Joshua, “Do not be afraid of them; I have given them into your hand. Not one of them will be able to withstand you.” (Joshua 10:8)

"...God will not commission you to do anything without ensuring your success...God does not promise you victory in every task you devise, but He will promise that you will be successful whenever you follow HIS will..."

This next part was what caught me off...  I tend to be someone that has the potential to mow people over rather than waiting on God in His time for His plan to be accomplished... Something I am process with, and have made great strides in...

"... Does it appear that people are keeping you from obeying Gods will?  Rest assured that God will not allow anyone or anything to prevent his children from accomplishing His purposes..."

Yes, blaming other people because they would rather not fit into the box you have shoved them in is not their fault...lol  

"...Be careful to evaluate success in the way God does... When you face opposition but know you are doing what God has asked, have confidence that He will accomplish everything that He desires..."

This week I have been prompted to look past the physical and into the spiritual in regards to progress or lack there of in ministry.  It has been helpful, it has been grace filled and the timing has been perfect (as always it is with God)  Allow God to pour his wisdom over you to discern what is REALLY happening in the spiritual.  Do not allow the ways of man to prevent you from progress in the spiritual. Cling to God, and He will show you, ask and trust.  Trust and ask.  Your discouragement will flee when you can see the eternal value in temporary failure...

(Quotes taken from Experiencing God by Henry T Blackaby)

It has been an interesting journey to look at every weak spot in my life and have God flip and turn it to His advantage.  When you have been engaged in sin as much as I have in my past, it is a worthy exercise to see all that was once filth become redeemed and have a clear record of this, to remind yourself what pit the Father pulled you from.  The many pits He has rescued you from. The many pits he rescues me from.  In knowing these, not only do you guard yourself from unknowingly re-committing, you also learn your weak points, blind spots become known, and your move closer to the Fathers heart.  You are continually humbled, not shamed (because there is no re-offending desired) continually looking upward in an attitude of surrender, and desire to glorify your Lord.  In seeing the glory of our Lord, it then becomes difficult to see the stain that once there was.

Where once there was no speech in a loved one, there is now a spirit filled discernment of others.

Where once there was mediation between parents, there is now mediation in the Body.

Where once there was a pride in sin, there is now a humble story.

Where once there was a stubborn will there is now an unwavering will of truth.

Where once these lips tore down, they now encourage.

Where once there was obsessive addiction, there is now a laser like vision.

Where lies were once sought out, now familiar and disregarded.

What once was silenced, can never be quieted.

What was meant for bad, He used for good; he uses and is using for good.  I am completely surprised as He chooses not only to redeem every piece of me, but to show me why, then include me in His plan.  What Grand adventure the Father brings to those whose trust and love are for Him.

``Do not lie to one another, for you have stripped off the old (unregenerate) self with its evil practices,

And have clothed yourselves with the new [spiritual self], which is [ever in the process of being] renewed and remolded into [fuller and more perfect knowledge upon] knowledge after the image (the likeness) of Him Who created it.`` -Paul (Col. 3:9-10

Her excitement was hardly containable.  She was building something grand, with towers, motes and a bridge. The focus was on and with the right water to sand ratio, she knew her success would be glorious.  Having a pile of moist sand, pails to her left and shovels to her right she began to construct the most elaborate sandcastle her eleven year old hands could shape. She has seen in the Disney books how they had more than just one tower, and how high Rapunzel lived, a mental blueprint for her days extravagant adventure.  Her expectations high and the noon day sun higher with lazer focus she built her kingdom from the top down as any new ruler would.

She was completely oblivious to her surroundings.  The little boy with a super soaker in the corner of the beach,  The mom screaming from the top of the beach for her kids to stop heading out into deeper waters, and the highly competitive soccer game being played on the grassy patch beyond the beach.

The final touches went onto the towers (feathers as flags in the tops of the peaks) and the walls delicately fortified (skipping stones neatly arranged on sand).  People began to gather and She then began to notice the OOO's and Ahhh's of her glorious kingdom.  An approving smile from mom, a jealous glare from a neighbor, a kingdom wreckage glance from the super soaker boy. She stood up, three hours older, and backed away for the first time; expectation met, complete self satisfaction... and then it happened... like a mangled road accident in slow motion, we could not look away.

The new kid to the beach, with the flashy soccer ball, and decorated uniform like he had just won the world cup yells "SCORES"!!!  And as planned as a kids soccer kick can be, the ball landed on the highest tower with the most beautiful princess squashed inside.  She screamed.  (the creator, not the created) She cried and became more distraught when she found out it had been the boys plan all along.  As she had planned three hours prior to build this kingdom, he had also made a plan of his own.

There was no apology, no forgiveness train. People scattered back to their regular activities and she stood, attempts of comfort by mom, but not recovered.  She set in her mind to ask that new flashy soccer playing wanna be world cup winner boy, why.

Why?  Why did you break my sandcastle?  The boy, looking really confused told her that her brother (with whom he had been playing soccer with) said she was building something for them to destroy, and as soon as she would step away from it, that would be the secret signal for the bomb to be dropped.  In normal boyish fashion, this is what he had done.

Misunderstanding.  Misunderstood.  That very morning, brother and sister discussed that it would be fun at the end of the day when the beach had been abandoned to clear it of all created kingdoms. Timing. Timing misunderstood.  Not knowing if she would ever recover from this catastrophic loss, she went for a swim.

Timing.  Gods timing.  Plans with Gods timing.  Eager to move forward, to plunge ahead?  Timing. Gods Timing with plans...

Today care for those devastated my misunderstood timing.  Be comforted those of you who can jump ahead.  The wreckers, the followers, the sisters and brothers.  In the family of God broken sandcastles are inevitable. We all live in and through our mistakes, and are affected by others peoples mistakes. Forgive, move on.  Go for a swim and let His refreshing waters awaken your senses and cleanse your body.  Emerge refreshed with the kingdom once again in your sight...

Wash me and I shall be whiter than snow...

"So I will always remind you of these things, even though you know them and are firmly established in the truth you now have.  I think it is right to refresh your memory as long as I live in the tent of this body,  because I know that I will soon put it aside, as our Lord Jesus Christ has made clear to me.  And I will make every effort to see that after my departure you will always be able to remember these things." ~ Paul, 2 Peter 1:12-15 (NIV)

Because it is Christ through me, a succession plan should always be in the works.  Because what I do in my calling is from God, it is only appropriate to always be open to my replacement and how that process may look.  Not just in the little things I don't mind giving up, but also in the things i love to do, and am specifically gifted to do.  

My calling is not "mine". It is a passing through of the work that needs to be done on earth.  Gods hand over mine, Gods son crucified and resurrected in my will, the Holy spirit giving nudges and my obedience part of my job description.  

It is meant to humble. It is meant not to be me. It is meant for my gaze to continually be in caught up in the eyes of my Savior.  Why would I not want to be a slave to the work of the King; even as he has chosen to call me His daughter.  Knowing my place in Christ, being who Christ had given his life for me to be is a job description.  My heart is continually laid out before him for Him to do in and through me what he must accomplish.  Once again bringing me back to a place of my gaze in Christ Jesus.  In the ready.  In the waiting, continually retreating back to the arms of my daddy in Heaven after the harsh treatment of the world has given another blow.

In the ridicule, it is Him , not I that takes on the hurt.  In the success it is Him that takes the glory, not me. It is all Him.  Both in the insult, and in the gain.  

In this, His power passes through, and He will always seek out others like me, my replacement, someone far greater in the kingdom. I scan, I seek them out as a recruiter for the great army.  The successor of a kingdom that is not of this world, a ruler that to have it all they must first have nothing.  And to have nothing will posses the keys to a kingdom that will never pass.  

Father keep us always focused on your succession plan for this world.  In Jesus Name, do not let the flesh of this world tempt us to hold onto what is never intended to be held onto.  Humble our lives for your will to pass through us to others.  You are everything, let us never forget your goodness to us.

 "God also said to Moses, “I am the Lord. I appeared to Abraham, to Isaac and to Jacob as God Almighty, but by my name the Lord I did not make myself fully known to them." Ex. 6:2-3

"God will continue to reveal himself to you according to your needs and his purposes.  You will come to know more and more about Him as you come to obey Him. When you grieve, he will become your comforter.  When you are in need, he will be your provider.  When you face a serious challenge, He will reveal that he is God almighty"  Henry Blackaby

This morning I woke up with a strong sense of being renewed.  I can go through dry spells, and great pastures of lush freedom and understanding. But this morning I know God in a grace filled, "all of your striving will never be enough" kind of way that has allowed me to rest for a week or so.  I had not felt far away, just like it was alright to snuggle longer in the morning with the girls, while I spoke to my Lord.  Like it was alright to be in fellowship with people in the community down at the beach rather than isolate myself in the office at home.  It is a season of learning that the box I had to put myself in for God is much more free moving that I had ever dreamed.  Constantly through and in my heart, as He has also written his testimony  on my life and in my mind.  I'm sure there will be times of needed and focused structure for my own discipline, but today i know my Lord as my constant.  Through His spirit, and His word.

Father show us when the different seasons of our lives need to be refocused.  When it is time to go out, or time to stay in, both in our spirits and in our physical bodies.  I am excited to see what this day in you brings and know that you have gone before us.  Have us be searching you around every corner and in the hearts of others to see you everywhere in and through all today.  We love you.

"Know that the Lord has set apart his faithful servant for himself;
    the Lord hears when I call to him.

Tremble and do not sin;
    when you are on your beds,
    search your hearts and be silent.
 Offer the sacrifices of the righteous
    and trust in the Lord."

"...No one is more precious in the Lords sight than a godly person. God is pleased whenever he finds someone who strives to live a righteous life and bring glory to Him...  ...It is futile for us to pray when we are knowingly practicing sin. But the opposite is also true. God chooses to honor us by listening to our every cry when we are living a godly life...  ...It is exhilarating to be set apart by God, knowing that God observes your consecrated life and is pleased with what he sees.  What a tremendous privilege to know that your life hold a special place in Gods heart! The world may not accord any special status to you, but you will know you are cherished by God.  The world finds new ways to honor people, but even the worlds most extravagant accolades are pitiful compared to the unfathomable blessing of holding a special place in the heart of God!..." Henry T Blackaby, Experiencing God

Notice the main focus here is a righteous life that brings glory to God. Righteousness is obedience in practice.  Obedience is not just doing what you already know to be right, it is also hearing from Gods heart and obeying what he has asked you to do.  How do you know what he has asked you to do?  You hear from Him... you hear from Him by knowing His voice...  How do you know His voice? (because Jesus said his sheep know His voice..John 10:27) Time spent in the word, time spent praying, time spent LISTENING, journalling, praising, humbling yourself... Time. How do you make time?  You choose to.  

Shaun was watching a game show the other night (I happened to stop in my passing through) in which a celebrity told the group that she wakes up every morning at 3 am to work out... for two hours.  She makes time to shape her body the way she thinks it should look...  Have you taken the time to allow God to shape your mind the way He sees fit?

"Be transformed by the renewing of your mind..." Takes time...

How can you set time apart to know Jesus voice?  Dust off your Bible and read  it more often than any other book... Is there anything you are doing that you should not?  What does repentance look like for you right now? Is there anything that you should be doing that you are not?  How can you move forward in that? Do you need to include the body of Christ in your accountability to stop doing the wrong you are doing, or start doing what God has called you to?  

Father we know you have set apart those who obey you and bring you glory.  Show us where to start and where to end in our striving.  Help us to live a lifestyle of Glory to your name.  Show us your wisdom so that we can live in wisdom.  Let your pleasure rest on us, so that we know what it is to walk in obedience to you.  

The Holy Spirit also testifies to us about this. First he says:

 “This is the covenant I will make with them
    after that time, says the Lord.
I will put my laws in their hearts,
    and I will write them on their minds.”

 Then he adds:

“Their sins and lawless acts
    I will remember no more.”

 And where these have been forgiven, sacrifice for sin is no longer necessary.

(Hebrews 10:12-18)

I have recently been humbly brought to my knees by three women in my life whom have bestowed wisdom to me that I had to recognize as God.  In my arrogance I assumed that Gods presence left their lives when I was not present in them.  That I was responsible for their growth because I had been a small opening in Christ to them.  

I cannot express the joy I have found in hearing from them, and knowing that God has already written the law in their hearts and in the their minds, and more, beckons them daily to take up their cross and follow Him. It is great encouragement at the beginning of a call into ministry that God would bring a harvest before the mission has even begun.  I am overwhelmed that He would bless me with such a gift, and have me know that He will bring others from the body to teach nourish and testify to their spirits.  Not only this but the promise of God having already put the law in their minds and in their hearts... How could I have tried to take responsibility for that which was not mine.  The responsibility and the glory is not mine, but His.  Of this I repent of today.

To rest in the know that God is at work always, and we need not strive, but simply obey.  To have our obedience influence eternity, or not influence it will be what our judgment will call us on in the end.  Head lifted toward the Father, our best efforts are only made pure by Him, in Him.  

"...Faith is the least self regarding of the virtues. It is by its very nature scarcely conscious of its own existence.  Like the eye which sees everything in front of it and never sees itself, faith is occupies with the object upon which it rests and pays no attention to itself at all.  While we are looking at God we do not see ourselves - blessed riddance...

...The man who has tried to purify himself and has had nothing but repeated failures will experience real relief when he stops tinkering with His soul and looks away to the perfect one...

Faith looks out instead of in and the whole life falls into line..."  Tozer 

How can it be that you would make my path strait when I had settled to wander?  How could you know that my greatest needs were to be overwhelmed with you, in you once again.  The mystery of the way you weave and spin our lives into place.  In your will, in my heart.  Our spiritual lives a beautiful tapestry weaved among the saints. Truly you give water to the thirsty and they no longer thirst.  In you there is no other truth, and in you the truth is endless. How can it be that you allow us to discover the mysterious way you work?  To be included in the mysterious way you are working. I can only fall to my face and ask humbly for more of you, at whatever cost you have required.  My obedience being a small price to pay to have your hand guiding me.  

You are it, you are my all, and in this space outside of time with you I am so grateful.  Keep that in my heart and my mind, forever.

"Even if I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it. Though I did regret it—I see that my letter hurt you, but only for a little while— yet now I am happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance. For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed in any way by us. Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death." ~Paul (2 Cor. 7:8-10)

"if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land." 2 Cron. 7:14

"...and leaves no regret..." Are you struggling with regret about the past?  Or worse, looking forward with dread of potential regret?  Repentance is a full 180 direction changer.  God can redeem every part of your past for His glory.  If you are sitting in regret, chances are, you have not fully repented. If you have chosen to move forward and have left the past to God, to redeem it, flip it and use it to His glory there will be no room for regret.  You will trust that God will use past things to shape you, others...

"...will humble themselves..." Being transparent for me transfers to being humble.  Being transparent with my husband and my children is even more humbling.  Being always open to correction, open to admitting my shortcomings, and always being reminded of the fact that it is only by the grace of God that HE HAS redeemed my past, and continues to work out my redemption moment by moment as I live for Him.

Both repentance and being humble are a process. Living in a posture of the two combined, (seasoned with grace and driven by love) is the closest thing to Christ-likeness I will become this side of Heaven.

Father, help us to see ourselves as we are.  Help us to have true sorrow of our sinful actions, and desire a full 180 to change in your power for you.  Help us be your children.  Children of the one and only true God. For your glory, and the glory of your body.

I was desperate, all I needed to do was see her to ask the question...

Through a flurry of messages, a phone call and the horrifying news of a 24 year old and an overdose... Shock.  Another one.  It was in this death that the question needed an answer.

In sudden death there is always a sense of helplessness, regret, unanswered questions to wonderment never asked in life.  Death is opportunity for those of us in slumber to wake up, to shape up, to desire more, demand more from those around us, and from ourselves.  I refused to allow this sinking ship go down, to allow evil to take its course, to come upon the situation like a shoal with distractions from the storm and devastate those aboard.

I didn't want to disturb the process, I just needed to have the question answered.  In the years of loving, in the years of being off the path on the path, and pushed, shoved around she needed to answer the question.  Not just for herself to hear and know it, but for her family, and for her savior, for eternity.  The question we can only answer ourselves.

 It was on a dock, surrounded by bull frogs, and every other marsh creature that we would go to dance the rhythm of trust when she was 15 and there we sat, over 10 years later.   She knows my love runs deep so to push through the sorrow to a point in the exchanges was trusted. The air sweet and warm, with a hint of gentle sorrow, a mighty angel keeping the spirit of despair at bay.  In the ask, I was desperate for her to know why.  In an near whisper of desperation it poured over me, from a place of hidden mysteries, a trusted place of complete surrender. In the recent storm of a loved one lost, she understood.  It was like she already knew I would be asking.

It was here that I learned of how "others" see in.  How "children" not yet invited or enticed by the body of Christ look in with questioning hearts, desperate for truth, to be told what and how...  It was here that I saw the souls of men brought to confusion because of the lack of unity in the body.  It was so real, so raw, so hurt my heart, the heart of the Father, that the spirit within me gasped when I realized the full consequence of our actions...  "I don't know where to go, this place believes something different from that place, and I just don't know what the real truth is... If someone would just teach me what to do, I would do it, I want to do it..."  The deep cry of every searching heart...  Through gentle tears of regret covered in sunglasses I apologized.

And there it was in clear mid day light. "Show me what to do and how to do it, because I want to do it." She believed... there was no question in my mind.  Question answered.  She believed and knew more than I had taught her, answered questions strait from the word, from the heart of Heaven, without hesitation.  As our conversation went on, I saw Christ in her, a steady mind filled with truth, being minded with truth... in process like the rest of us.  I was horribly surprised, and knew the challenge she would face in the coming days.  The whisper of a savior cannot be denied.  A wildfire can begin with one small spark.  It can spread quicker than we can control, and span a large area.  And so is my prayer for my beautiful sister in Christ.

If you have read this, please pray for her daily this coming month.  She has been in places many of us cannot imagine to be.  She is fighting the despair of recently loosing her closest family member to an overdose.  Pray for freedom, pray for light in darkness, for the hope of Jesus to overcome. Pray for angle armies to pave the way, for her to have a sober mind, and not be overwhelmed.  For seeds planted over a decade ago to yield a full harvest.  For Gods name to be great in the midst of great pain.  For God's people to be ready and welcoming for the harvest.  Pray as God leads:)  As I know he will.  Thank you, as this girl is a sister in Christ, a member still waiting to see what part of the body she will be part of...

http://www.gofundme.com/yjzda6x

And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.  James 5:15-16

This morning I fall short of prayer.  Prayer for people, prayer for the town I live, my neighbors, the Nation.  I am mediocre even in the prayer I offer up for myself.  We are told to "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." I want more than anything to be in God's will, so at a crossroad I will wait on the Lord.

God had me in a place of prayer over 15 years ago, and I wrote this song.  I still struggle to get through singing it in its entirety.  It is simple, and yet fully captures the heart of a people desperate for God to move...

We are dry Lord
and we are week
Send down your righteousness
Its living streams we seek

Waiting is so, so, so hard Lord
we're desperate to see you face to face 
the glory surrounds your thrown
We cant help but scream out
we scream out, we scream out,

Release us Lord
Release us Lord 
Release us Lord

It was a time of lonely seeking, a place of God revealing, and me responding.  It was all very overwhelming.  A shoulder brushed, an abuse taken in.  A glance understood of a fear deeper than anything human, oppression.  Eyes marked with hidden pain, others taunted with sickness, dancing on the edge of a cliff, most were deep with nothing, dead. In the desperate search for more, for light, for good... there was nothing.  Some were dead.

Every encounter of someones spirit became too overwhelming for my 21 year old heart to take in.  My lack of maturity and understanding reduced me to a sobbing mess.  I caved under the heavy weight of this gift, begging for the Lord to give it to someone else, to take it from me. My heart hardened, and I could no longer see the unending suffering around me.  No longer had His eyes, His heart for the Lost.  

For every move that happens in the unseen, there is one that happens in the seen.  Spirit, Physical.  

We are called to prayer in this day.  We are not called to instant results.  No, we stand in a fast flowing river, not overwhelmed by the current that passes by. Not dragged down by those flowing with the current.  We hold fast to the truths and promises our Jesus has given us.  The word says, "the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective".  Powerful and effective.  Stand your ground. Pray continually, allow the heavens to pour upon you the burdens of this world. Place them at the cross, where all is redeemed, being redeemed, and one day will be fully redeemed.  

Mistakes made at 21 will not be repeated.  Knowing in someones eyes what is happening in their heart is a beautiful Spirit filled mystery, a gift, a softening of the heart.  It is no longer about me...it never was, this prayer thing...

"Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.”  ~Jesus

In reading Romans 10-13 this morning I feel humbled.  So many things don't make sense in the world, and yet, Gods will is being done right before our eyes.  My hearts desire is to see beyond what does not make sense, into the understanding of who God is, His plan and what He is doing. 

Give me your eyes, beyond this temporal place, not my home.

Can you show me what is meant when I am laughed at and made fun of for my faith? What is it when My patience has come to its end and I am forced to fall, fighting back into your arms, becoming overwhelmed in your beauty, your grace, and warmth of your love?  When brothers are crucified for believing with so much conviction. Can you show me what is meant with my spiritual eyes when a child gases upon the tomb of family that will never be seen again, or parents that fight and plead and beg for the soul of a child gripped by the evils of addiction.  When suffering overtakes light, when masses are disregarded as nothing, and generations lost to the darkness of this place... When your creation gives up of itself, cracks and explodes from the groans of waiting years for the return of its master, its Lord, the uncreated One. 

The Physical is not meant to be understood.  We live in a place not meant for those bound by the restriction / by the freedoms of our eternal home.  

I cannot explain to an ant why I discipline my children, or how they are fed.  For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are your ways higher than my ways and your thoughts than my thoughts.

What you reveal I will stand in.  This morning once again the scales have been removed, and deeper into your heart and mind I will stay.  Ever focused on you. Give me eyes that see and hear the whispers of hope for what is to come.  Help me to see people the way you see them, situations in all wisdom for the glory of your name.  This temporary home and all it gives for what it is, ever pointing my homesick heart to be lost in your never ending eyes.  Tip my head up, let us know your pleasure this day.

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize."
1 Corinthians 9:24-27

This morning God has brought grace and wisdom to my life in the way of 1 Corinthians 9. So much wisdom, so much application.

"Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training..."  What things have you placed in your life to safeguard an attack of the enemy?  How much time do you spend in the Word? in Prayer?  looking after your body for health reasons? God has called us to himself with a purpose.  Live in that purpose, train for that purpose, and do not allow your body or the world or anything else tell you what to do.  Live in obedience.  Train your body mind and soul for His glory.

"Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly.." Know what God has called you to, and do it well.  What is your target? how do you know you have done what God has called you to do?  are these targets temporal or eternal?  does every aspect of your life point to the same vision?

I am coming out of a time of weariness.  I have not figured out why I had been weary  for so long, and so I gave up trying to figure it out.  "...Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus..." Because when i am honest with myself, I know that "even youth shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."

I will continue to "wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

Waiting has not been easy, and it is hard to believe one could grow weary in the wait... But I know I am not alone in reading the Bible that David also waited on the Lord... and Isaiah told the people to also wait... as they would be renewed.

Part of the race you have been called to run is to prepare while you wait on God.  Steady your heart,  know His voice in peace and in trouble, so that when you time comes as it does in small ways every moment of every day, you will be ready.  Father, give us the stamina to wait on you, and love your reign in us while we wait.